Wednesday, June 22, 2011

A Lights' Family Wedding!

Today is the day! Penelope is getting married and we are all more than excited about the festivities. Since hosting a wedding in your own house is difficult times one-hundred I set up "Bridal Camp" in the study which includes five bridesmaids running around the study trying to get ready. I ordered as much wedding-appropriate makeup as possible so I could help Penny save money in that department but somehow there still aren't enough colors. The girls have been here for about an hour at this point and getting ready is no easy chore.
I try to ignore the girls pestering complains about makeup and focus on Penny. "I'm having MAJOR second thoughts about my dress Ambs...I don't think it flatters me like I thought it did a week ago!" I try my hardest not to roll my eyes. "Really Penn? I think it looks even BETTER than it did last are a beautiful bride." She gives me a warm smile and hugs me. "Thanks Amber. I'm so nervous to get re-married, I don't want to mess things up like I did with Brady...we both know how that ended." 
Amber-That was not one bit your fault. Brady was the one who hurt you, Brady was the one who cheated on you, and Brady is the one to this very day who let you go. Don't you dare blame yourself for what happened with him.
Penny-I'll try but I'm still nervous.
She seems to space off for a moment before realizing something. "Holy crap!" she calls out. I give her a suspicious look and say, "Um Penny? Everything alright there?" She smiles a bit but I can see the worry in her eyes. "What's wrong?" I press. "I have no one to walk me down the aisle," she whispers. The death of our parents was difficult although I wasn't even there. Penny was and I can tell she's had a hard time dealing with it. "Oh geez, I guess I forgot about that ONE detail...who could walk you down?" I ask. She looks clueless but guesses, "Myself? I could walk solo...that could be....interesting." It pains me to see her so sad. 
Amber-No...what about...our BROTHER?
Penelope-Jason? You know he's got mental issues.
Amber-Yeah but so what? He's under your care, am I correct?
Penelope-Yes but that doesn't mean he's capable of not doing something wrong! I love Jason but I want this wedding to go PERFECT. 
Amber-It would mean so much to Jason. I haven't seen him in YEARS. 
 Penelope-I really don't know if this is a good idea. Could we even get him charged out of the hospital soon enough?
Amber-If someone can make it happen WE can. 
Amber-Look at it this way sis, you could walk down with your brother that you love or alone. Which do you want?

She doesn't reply but we both know the answer-it's Jason. I rush out of the room for only a moment to recruit some old friends of mine who are at the party to go discharge Jason from the hospital. I ask someone I trust and know well because this is my brother we're talking about. I would go myself but there's too much to be done here. Once they're gone I go about helping the bridesmaids AGAIN. Penny is still shaken with nervousness so she grabs something to drink from the bar and chats with some girls.

While Penny is chatting it up with the other bridesmaids I notice Vanessa ruffling through the clothing rack aimlessly. When I saw Vanessa was part of the bridal party at first I was shocked. But after Penny explained to me how close they are after planning my birthday party together I understand. "Are you doing alright there Ness?" I question. She gives a small smile and replies, "Yeah I'm fine, just a bit sad. I don't know if I'll ever get to be in the position that Penny is in-only a couple children which is easy and about to get married...After the challenge who knows if anyone will love me like Chase loves Penelope? It's just a shame to think about." I give Nessa a pat on the back and a tight hug. "Vanessa, you're great. I have no doubt in my mind that you will find a man one day. At least you're not me who can't even get her boyfriend to accompany her to a wedding! What a mess that is." I say sadly. Now she's the one consoling me. 
Vanessa-Casey is great but if he wants to be a jerk let him. He will miss what he could have had.
Amber-I don't know if we're broken up yet...I don't know what will happen when I next see him
Vanessa-Do what you need to do girl.
The conversation with Ness only ties more knots in my stomach on top of the wedding stress. At this point my stomach is a quadruple tied knot of worry, stress, fear, and anticipation around Casey AND the wedding. It doesn't help that Ivana Groove (the girl who insulted me at the bachelorette party) is feeling sick and it makes her complain more. "Uhh Amber, I think the wine you have here is bad I don't feel too good..." she holds on to her stomach and sprints for the bathroom. She comes back and says, "I think you ordered bad wine...I knew you were out to get me!" I gasp and quickly get off the phone with the florists. "No, I would never! You must have a bad stomach!" I insist. I did not and would not give out bad wine on purpose. "Yes you did you moronic BIT-" I am about to take a verbal beating when Penny screams. 

"WHAT HAPPENED?!" I shout before reaching her and seeing the damage. "Holy...oh my gosh. What happened?" I question. She sighs and buries her face in her hands. "I don't know...I was just drinking the wine and it spilled...all over my dress. I can't believe I did this," she complains. I am about to reply when Ivana decides to instead. "Actually, Amber probably planned that because she's not your maid of honor," she states. "She made me sick with the wine so it wouldn't surprise me if she did this to you." I am so offended but Penny replies before I can. "There's no way that's possible, I was by myself..." she says before she keeps crying. "Well, it's more likely than not," she says rudely before stomping off to the other side of the small room.
"Okay Penny, you need to relax," I say. 
"Need to relax?" she says, almost screaming. "Nothing is going right! A bridesmaid is puking her guts out, my dress it stained, and I have not a single person I WANT to walk me down the freakin aisle! This is turning out HORRIBLY!! Maybe we're not meant to be...I can't DO THIS anymore!!" she starts bawling her eyes out. 
I'm not good with crying unless it's from a baby so the best I can do is pat her on the shoulder. "I wish we had another dress for you to wear..." I mumble. She looks up at me and says, "My wedding is in less than thirty minutes there's NO WAY I can go out there looking like this!" She bursts into more and more tears. The other bridesmaids look like they want to do something but they all hold off until I'm done. "Wait Penn...stop crying. Please?" She wipes her eyes but keeps shedding silent tears. "Why?" I think how I will word this because I don't even know if it's true. "When mom, ya know, passed away did she leave you anything?" She thinks for a moment and replies, "She left me a bin of items that I haven't had the heart to look through yet. Why? You're confusing me Ambs."

"Penny...I may just have an idea" I say happily.
With a few calls and some detective work I find my way to the box from my mom. I am on the phone with Penny's neighbor who we both gave permission to go inside and she is staring in the bin. "Is there anything...white in the box?" I ask. The neighbor pauses while she searches and I hear a faint "Aha!" I ask her if it's there and she gives me some good news. "YES! The dress is here...need me to bring it over?" I ask to PLEASE bring it over and I can finally breath. As long as the dress is pretty enough Penny should be just fine.

I tell Penny what has happened and she is excited. "Are you serious Amber? The dress is in the box?" I assure her that it is and she can hardly contain her joy. "Oh my gosh! That's great...I faintly remember what it looks like but I remember loving it in the photo's as a kid.
We toss the ruined dress to the side and Penny slips into the REAL crowd pleaser. She gasps once she sees herself in it and claps happily. "Oh my gosh..." she barely whispers. "This dress is perfect." She didn't have this reaction to her original dress and I'm so happy she is happier with this one. "Yay, I'm SO glad you like it girlie!" I cheer. "Mom would be so proud of you if she were here," I say. She starts to tear up and I make the final announcement.

"Don't cry sis, lets get you married!"
The flower girls start things off. Maud, Gwen, and Carina made the cut because they are utterly adorable and very calm and sweet. I aged them up a day or two after they were born so that they could take place in the wedding today. They do a great job as they try to drop petals as best as they can. Maud (to the right) gets tired after awhile and simply dumps the flowers on the ground and crawls away. Gwen (middle) and Carina (left) take their careful time to lie down each petal precisely. After the drawn out first group the wedding finally moves on :)
Us bridesmaids start our walk down the aisle and as I'm walking past the back pew I gasp. "What the hell Casey, when did you get here?!" I screech in whisper. The sight of his face after our recent fight it startling to me and I hadn't prepared myself for this. "I'm here to see the wedding, Chase is my friend!" I gasp. "Are you serious?" I whisper back. "Of course I am!" he replies. "But you better get moving because the rest of the bridal party is lined up." I take note and rush forward to the wedding. I keep my eye on Casey the whole time.
Finally the main beauty walks down the aisle. Although she was not so happy about not having someone to walk her down the aisle before she is perfectly happy with Jason. Jason decided that he wanted to wear swim-wear so no one tried to stop him. It shows the true dynamics of immediate family and it makes me crack up to see my little brother and sister so jolly.
Penelope and Chase together are so...perfect. As a bridesmaid from the sideline I am gawking at their beauty as a couple. 
We are gathered here today to witness a marriage
Marriage is a bond that should not be broken.
Penelope and Chase do you take one another
to have and to hold
to love and respect and cherish
through sickness and in health
until death do you part?

"I do"
Afterwards everyone heads to the after party 10-feet away. There is cake and tables so everyone eats and hits the dance floor! I want so badly to join but I can't get over the ceremony. Penelope and Chase are so in love and anyone in their right mind can see it from a mile away. I've been receiving so much guidance on Casey recently from friends and it's more than overwhelming. I love Casey and there's no doubt in my mind about that. But a part of me needs to let go and move on to a love like my sister now has. It needs to be done.
Casey is off to the side and I approach him with worry. "Hey Amber," he says clearly aware of our most recent fight. "Hi Casey," I reply. So good so far, eh? As much as I want to avoid what needs to be done I need to get to it. "Hey Case-" I start saying. He interjects, "-About the other day-oh, what do you want to say?" I want to insist that he tell me what he needs to say but I know that if I do I won't be able to go through with this.

"Casey, we've been dating for SEVERAL months now. I love you with all my heart and that will never change but we've both been hurt and we both have relationship issues. My sister is now happily married and I want to be able to experience what she has. I have experienced that with you but things aren't getting any better. I love you so much..."

"Are you breaking up with me?" he asks.
"Yes I am," I say. Getting those three words out feel like the hardest thing I've ever had to do and it eats at me until he replies. 

"You're serious? Amber, if you love me so much then why in the world are you breaking it off with me?"

"I want to be HAPPY Casey...all the time I just want to be eternally happy with the guy I'm with. Like I said I LOVE YOU but we're just not meant to be. Can you please accept this and can we be friends?"  I say, practically begging. Surprisingly he tells me what I want to hear.

"I love you too Amber...I'll never get over you," he says. I pull him into a tight hug and a single tear drops down my face. I can hear him silently crying and I hug him tighter. "You'll always have a place in my heart," I whisper.

I turn around before this turns into a huge bawling-fest. I'm happy to see the photographer snapping photo's of Penny partying with my kids! (By the way, yes, Kaden and Karl did age up...Karl is on the left, Kaden on the right) "Hey, is there any room for your good old mom?" I say to the kids. They all laugh and make room for me. Penny dances to the other side of the party and gives me a wink as she goes.
I hop in for a couple photo's too. The kids dance like crazy to every song that comes on. A lot of the guests have made their way out of the party so we changed the station to a kids one and they all dance to their favorite single "Who Says" by Selena Gomez.
Before the party can truly end I talk things out with Ivana. She completely apologizes for everything she said to me and even admits that she doesn't think I'm a slut. "I actually think what you're doing is so cute...I wish I could have so many great kids and I really look up to you Amber, I have since I saw you at Penny's sleepover as kids." She also confesses that the reason she was so moody was because...she's pregnant! I make sure to wish her the best of luck and I wipe away all of the hard feelings.
So, this is it! Congrats to the happy couple!

<3 :)

Yay, I'm so glad they're finally married! Thanks a ton for reading and (hopefully) bearing with this different form of post. I did the X-Large pictures so you wouldn't miss out on a single thing on the big day! This was a dry-run of any future weddings I have to write... (wink wink!!) :D Thanks so much!!

"Never underestimate the power of your encouragement" 

Monday, June 20, 2011

Is It The End? :Babies 55, 56, and 57

Thanks to QueenILeasha for the Duckie Dress. The name is adorable and I think it's more than perfect for the summer months. Your words are too kind :)
Also thanks to Music131313 (Vanessa Wood) for this gorgeous chiffon dress. It was so sweet of you to actually gift me this after I was too afraid to buy it :)
Poppy and Rosebud have one last wish before they move out-a slumber party. They had planned on inviting over more than twenty friends and the thought made me nervous! I told them to limit it to five girls but they insisted that drama would occur in their social group if they did that.  It took us awhile but we finally agreed to let them have over their niece but good friend Dina Lights (my grand daughter). I take this photo as they are setting up the snacks and I can see the excitement in their eyes.
 Here are some pictures from the crazy night. I am up almost the entire night right with them because their talking is so loud but I don't have the heart to yell at them. They just want to have fun and be GIRLS! They wake up early and Dina has to go to school but the twins plus Finn have another idea...
They grow up on me! I don't want them to age up so quickly but this challenge isn't going to sit around and wait for me. I didn't want Finn to age up so quickly because he is my milestone and my joy. But he refuses to leave his sisters sides. They tell me that they're moving into a house right by the beach and that I should visit anytime I want. They plan on starting a community shelter together and I'm very excited for them.
Once the three of them are moved out the house is a lot more peaceful and I don't know if I like it. I prefer to always have something to turn to or something to deal with...or maybe I'm just a seasoned mom. But walking into the babies room and away from my peaceful kitchen is when I notice my work is only just starting. With two babies crying their eyes out and Claire and Char trying to climb out of the cage I come to realize my I have a lot more to deal with then I thought. Without a second thought I decide to enlist some help from a friend.
I recruit the help of my good friend Ashley Brooks. Charlotte loves hanging out with Ash because they have the same hair color and style. So since Char refuses to let me hold her this morning I spend my time running back and forth between Kaden, Karl, and Claire.  Ashley and I share tons of parenting tips as we care for the kids and I get rid of a lot of recent stress venting to her. It feels good knowing I have a good friend right around the corner.
When it's time for the kids naps I lie them down and I whisper to Ashley. I don't want to wake the kids up but I want to watch them since I have the windows open. Somehow we start talking about men and I tell her everything.
Amber-Dating such a perfect guy is so hard...sometimes I love him and sometimes I want to smack him up right for some of the comments he makes. He can make me feel like the best girl in the world and the saddest girl in a matter of seconds. 
Ashley-Geez girl. I haven't had a boyfriend yet in the challenge so I don't know how you deal but I do know something-if a guy does that to you DUMP HIM! I know you love him but I want you to think about what he's done for you and what he will do...and do you even want that?
Amber-I guess I've never thought of it like that. I don't know what to do but I'll talk to him soon, I have to invite him out and ask if he wants to go to Penny's wedding with me anyway
Ashley-That's a big step...but good luck. I know you'll make the right choice in the end Ambs

We chat a little bit longer about my love life but that's pretty much it of the conversation. I really feel like Ashley has given me her honest advice and now I know that if I REALLY want to break it off...I simply should.
 To relieve stress Ash suggests hopping on the water slide. We change into our bathing suits and have a GREAT time. She shows me some pretty cool tricks that I've never even dreamt of. Not only does the slide get my mind off things but it also lets me bond with Ash. We've never been close until recently and I've come to realize what a great person she is. We've been through a lot in the past but now we're over it and starting fresh.
We also hop in the sprinkler and laugh for a while because neither of us want to get wet. "Well then why in the world are we in a sprinkler then?" she asks. I crack up because I don't know why. So we end up getting soaked and having a fun time. Girl time is what I need, I feel like I never get that.
We also have PHOTO TIME! I love taking pictures especially when it's with great friends and family. Ashley is more than willing to pose for fun pictures with me and these are the four that we like. They are taken in the true spirit of friendship and that's all that counts.
 After getting soaking wet we come inside and get showered. While our hair is drying Ash suggest aging up the kids so I can have a bit of an easier time. I think this is an excellent plan and aging we do! Karl (on top) and Kaden (on bottom) are both super cute with their red hair and green skin tone. They are very relaxed boys but they love to demolish anything that comes near them. This can be an issue sometime but usually they're...decent.
Charlotte (on left) and Claire (on right) also grow up! They are really silly young girls who love to play dolls and dress up like princesses. I don't think a single day goes by where they don't laugh for ten minutes straight. They're such a joy to have around, I love having giggly kids :)
 Ashley has to leave and tend to her own kids after the birthdays but I'm glad to have some alone time with the kids. I put Claire and Char to bed after FIVE princess stories and then I focus on the tots for an hour. I start teaching Kaden to talk and I play with Karl for a little while. Toddlers are so fun to be around because all they do is giggle and stare!
Before I can go to sleep I call up a man who Ashley told me about earlier. He's an Chinese man from across the world and he wants to be in challenges. Ashley said she was debating using him but thought he would be good for me too. It's midnight by now but I figure the time difference will cover it up so I go ahead and give him a call. He agree's to fly in by tomorrow morning. I wasn't expecting to have a father this soon but the sooner the better, eh?
I wake up to my next baby daddy strolling into my room. "Ah!" I scream. "When did you get here Lee?" He laughs and says, "Your daughter let me in! She told me to scare you!" I grit my teeth and mutter to myself She best have a reason. But Lee seems to find it funny so I let it slide. I get up and he gives me a romantic hug. "You're very pretty Amber..." he says. I say thank you. I haven't even had my morning coffee yet so I am in no way, shape, or form ready to be romantic. "Is there any way we could hurry the process up? I'm so tired...I'm sorry Lee." He says it's okay and that he is going to meet up with some people here anyways. .
 Before hopping in bed he makes me promise to have twins or triplets because in China you can only have one baby. I tell him I'll try my best but there's no promises
After getting things done with Lee I usher him out and finally care for the babies. I heard them crying the entire time I was with Lee and it made me feel like a terrible mother. "Oh hello there Kaden!" I coo. "Mommy was busy but now she's here with you!" I tickle him and he starts laughing. I know that even if I have to give up some family time occasionally my kids will always love me.
I put Kaden and Karl down to eat and get to the nitty-gritty of cleaning my child-infested home. Kids are probably the messiest and sloppiest people on earth that you can't help but love. I make a mean look on my face as I mop up a difficult stain on the floor. "Grrr! You stupid stain, be cleaned!!" I shout. Karl puts down his bottle and looks up. "Why mommy so upset?" I realize how loud I'm being and assure him that I'm fine.
Afterwards I start cooking appetizers and desserts to freeze...tonight is Penny's bachelorette party! I don't want to go out to the club when I'm pregnant because last time I did that things didn't go too I am throwing it right here at home. Karl and Kaden join me in the yard playing on the blocks table while I cook in the outdoor kitchen. 
I pull some old furniture out from the storage room. I used to have these chairs out here until I got the backyard renovated. But now they serve a better purpose so drag them out with the little muscle I have. I make a mental note to hit the gym or go home because I'm so NOT fit.
While I'm setting up I overhear a cute conversation from my boys.

Karl-Kaddden! Stop eating block, it will hurt you!
Kaden-Nu-uhh! Block love me, nom nom nom
Karl-(keeps building) You so silly bro! 

The conversation reminds me of what I miss out on when I do things non-family related and it makes me miss having so much free time. Thank goodness the wedding is in less than a week because once that's over I'll have so much more family time.
By now it's past 3 o' clock and the girls are walking in the door. I wish I hadn't spent the whole day outside because I can start to feel a sun burn coming on. To make myself feel better I put some aloe on and then sit down to assist Claire with her homework. "But I just DON'T GET IT!" she shouts. "Why is a-squared plus b-squared, c-squared? Why is the Pythagorean theorem so darn important? I don't like it, why should anyone else?!"
"You need to get the learning in now so when you're older the harder things won't be so hard. I think you're doing a great job and at this rate you could be the smartest person in the world!" She smiles and replies, "Really? Me?....the smartest person EVER?" She gazes off in shock. I told a small lie but with kids these days who knows? "It's possible...just keep working hard," I instruct.
When people start to arrive at the party I start getting excited. All of the bridesmaids are here and I recognize them all as Penny's high school friends. I remember all the times they would sleepover and keep me up all night. But now we're all adults and it's a pleasant surprise to see them all again. Penny points to a pretty blonde and says, "See her? That's my maid of honor." I recognize her as Deana Maloney. She was always sweet. Penelope wanted me to be the MOH but I turned down the request because it's too hard to plan a wedding, be a huge part of the wedding, and host the wedding. I'm kind of jealous of Dee but I'm at fault for this anyway.
I can't help but make my way over to Dee...
"Hey girl! Been a long time!" I shout over the blaring music. 
"Oh Amber! Hey! How are you?" she replies.

Amber-Doing good...So I heard from a little bird that you're the maid of honor! How special!
I can hardly keep the jealousy out of my voice.
Deana-Yeah! I was so surprised it wasn't you but I'm honored at the same time.
Amber-Actually I WAS her first choice but I turned it down. But it's cute that she chose one of you girls, I'm way too busy hosting the wedding and everything...
Deana-WHOA! You're hosting the wedding too? Props to you I could never handle that stress! Especially with your big family I don't know how you do it.

"I try," I say nonchalantly brushing the hair from my face. I dance with her for a little bit but soon the main guests arrive and no one can stay away.
The exotic dancers! Penelope at first looks at me and gives me the glare of death. I shrug it off and join her to make it better. Two male dancers surround her so I hop in the back. "See? This is fun!" I shout. Penny's always been way more outgoing then me and she soon falls into her second nature-having fun no matter what.
"Are you sure this isn't cheating?" she asks after a while. "Because it sure feels like it."
"Of course not!" I say. "They're just nice people doing nice things. Enjoy your party!"

She laughs and oh-so-obviously gets over the dancers. She dances with them like there's no tomorrow but I know that she won't do anything with them. News travels way too fast around Sunset Valley and she's a smart enough girl to not put herself in that situation. 

I have a photographer I hired snap some cute pictures of the bridal party. I love being in a group of girls that I've known for a long time.  For the first photo it's just us girls being silly but after that the dancers hop in the shots and by no means do I say no! The boys are way too fun to say no to!
After the "photo-shoot" a bridesmaid named Ivana Groove approaches me. "You need to stop acting like you're so cool. Dee told me exactly what you said and how snobby you were acting. Like really? Get over it, your sister doesn't like you as much as she likes us. GET OVER IT." I am shocked by what this girl is saying. I think I knew her when I was younger and I can't believe she's insulting me on my own property. I wanted this party to end with no drama but I won't ever NOT defend myself.
"EXCUSE ME?!" I shout. "I never said anything to you so I don't believe you have any reason to be yelling at me. Gosh, I guess some people never grow up."
"Yeah, I totally agree," she rudely says. "Like you. Everyone thinks you're some savior/angel/perfect mom just because you have so many kids. Me? I think you're a SLUT."
More rage fills me than EVER before-more than when Brady beat Penny, more than when Casey cheated on me, and more than when my old boyfriend Corbin left me. 
Amber-You get the HELL off of my property NOW! You don't come here just to insult my family and I! 
Ivana-I do whatever I want. But I actually WANT to leave you selfish bitch.
Tears start flooding my eyes but I refuse to cry. It's Penny's party and it's about her, not some rude bridesmaid. Penny sadly see's me and pulls me off to the side as people start to leave.
"Are you okay?" Penny asks with worry in her voice.

Penny-Tell me what happened.
Amber-I just...a friend of yours approached me and said some things but it's really no big deal. I over reacted anyway.
Penny-Okay OBVIOUSLY you're lying. There are tears in your you know how hard it is to make you cry? I used to try so hard and I never could. 
Amber-I am upset about what she said but I really don't want you to sweat it. Your wedding is so close and I don't want anything getting in the way. Please just trust that I'm okay.
Penny-Okay I trust you

Penny tries to get some more information out of me but I don't want to say anything. Dealing with this girl at the wedding will be nothing short of difficult but I know I'll make it through. Soon after Penny leaves and so do the rest of the party guests. One person who makes an appearance is my new baby or babies though. I rub my belly and finally head to sleep after a long day.
Waking up today is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. Not only do I have a pounding headache from drinking but the weight of what that bridesmaid said last night is still getting to me. Could I really be a 'slut'? I do this challenge for children, not the pleasure. I hate the thought that more people could feel that way than just her but I'm hoping not. I drink some coffee and take a couple pills when Casey calls me up to go to breakfast. I have to ask him to the wedding anyway but what Ashley said is still in my mind about him.
Casey doesn't even let us eat before he's being romantic. "Geez Case, you're just like this challenge father I was with yesterday-don't try to be romantic with me before I've had my breakfast!" He pulls away and gives me a weird look. "I'd prefer if you didn't talk about the challenge father's Amber." I realize what I've done and apologize immediately. "Whatever," he says. I try to get things back to lovey-dovey so I bring up the wedding. 
Amber-So anyway Casey...remember how I told you that Penny is getting married? 
Amber-well I am a bridesmaid and I need date. Would you want to be my date for her wedding?
Casey-I don't know...
Amber-How do you not know? Isn't it implied that you would be my date anyway? I thought this is what couples do...
Casey-Okay fine, I'll go. Is that what you want to hear? Geez Amber, one second you're offending me by talking about all the men you're with and the next you're trying to be romantic? 
Amber-I didn't mean to offend you Casey...why are you being like this? You used to be so understanding of my challenge even when I brought a father to the same club as you! You forgave me right away and still loved me. What's changed?
Casey-Maybe I've finally realized what a joke it is to be dating you. You go around with these men, giving birth left and right, and I'm just supposed to sit here and wait for you? I used to be okay with this but I don't know if I can anymore. You're pushing me to the edge.
Amber-I'm a joke to date? I'm sorry for the inconvenience but it's been this way since we've started dating! Why do you have to be this way...
Casey-My head is finally straight. I don't want it to be like this either but I have to do what's best for me.
Amber-So is this the end? Is this REALLY how it's going to all end?
Casey-I don't know Amber, I don't know anything anymore

He walks away and gets in his car. I didn't even get to eat breakfast, the only thing that happened was more fighting. And I still don't even know if he's coming to the wedding with me. This is just too much for me to deal with at once.
Karl and Kaden provide very nice distractions from the pain swelling up in my heart. I feel like the past 2 hours have been hell and I'm just waiting for it to be over. But nonetheless I am a mother with many things to do so I get to it. Like I said before, I haven't had much time for family lately but tonight is a Friday and I've got nothing to do.
I have some time on my hands but not much so I get right to work. Kaden takes his first wobbly steps and Karl says a word or two. After a lot of physical time with the boys my pregnancy weighs down on me and calls me to sit down for a little while.
 The girls call and tell me they're going on a bike ride right after school. I say that they can but they must wear helmets and sun tan lotion to protect them form the sun. Having Kaden and Karl quiet and no one to keep me busy around the house offers some MAJOR free-thinking time. I could think about all of the recent negatives but I choose to direct my mind in another direction-the challenge. I've come so far and I'm more than aware of it. I remember when I first started the challenge as an ambitious young girl with designer clothes. Now I'm lucky if I don't get spit-up on my clothes and if I don't some other sort of battle soils it. I love where I am in my life, in fact I even made a video out of my joy. Watch it below.
I love where I am and I wouldn't change what I've done for anyone or anything. I'm not even close to finishing but I am perfectly content with where I'm at :)
 After my emotional "thinking" session the girls are home and all dolled-up. I said it before and I'll say it again, they LOVE dressing up! They sit me down on the tiny beanbag chairs and show me their princess-moves. They strut back and forth waving and smiling saying, "Good day sir! Oh please, no photographs, you'll ruin my princess-ness!" They crack me up which I can see they like. 
After awhile they get tired but don't want to take off the costumes. I sit them down and chat with my little girls who literally take the pain right out of my chest. I announce my pregnancy to them. At first they're shocked but they know what my challenge is and think it's cool. "That's so cool mommy, can I touch your tummy?" asks Claire. I laugh at the wording and insist that she does.
"Whoa, it's kicking and everything! Is that a real human in there?" she asks in wonder. I give her an excited yes to which she replies, "I've never seen anything like!" She rubs my belly and talks to her brother/sister(s) in the making. "Oh yeah, I'll make you the coolest kid when you come out. I'll give you a makeover and EVERYTHING, we'll be best friends!" she says. "Hey, what about me?" asks poor Charlotte in the background. "Oh right, you'll be best friends with me and my sissy Char!"
We don't do much for the rest of the night except crack up over the movie Gnomeo and Juliet and eat some pizza. The girls are going through a Princess movie phase where all the time they want to re-watch Cinderella, Beauty and the Beast, and Sleeping Beauty to only name a few. Gnomeo and Juliet was a far stretch for them but I like that it's younger version of the classic tale. 
Before I go to bed I do some laundry and spot that THREE gnomes have made their way to my home. Another laundry gnome popped up yesterday and this regular gnome was found by Charlotte on a field trip. They all gather together and it's the most adorable AND creepy thing to see. 
This morning is a quiet one. The girls sleep in so I take my time getting changed. I get frustrated after a while and just change into a sports bra and yoga pants, it's only girls and toddler boys around here anyway! Since the sun is slowly rising today some outdoor yoga and exercise sounds so good. 
At first it's just me for a while but then the girls wake up and they want a piece of my workout. I make things more fun by doing some jumping jacks which sadly makes my carefully-done bun fall out. By now the sun is risen but the beautiful view of the beach still remains. I make a mental note to visit the beach sometime soon with the family, I love the sand.
Once we get tired we go off to do our own things. I spend a good amount of time in the garden while the girls diligently play hop-scotch. They've always been in-doors girls but I can see they're starting to warm  up to the great outdoors. I'm afraid the sun will eat them alive!
 "Aha, you lost AGAIN!" teases Claire. Charlotte is obviously very upset so Claire tries to tone down her teasing tone. "I'm just kidding sis, you're getting better! I think you might become the best player in the world!" she says, copying my lie about her being the smartest girl in the world. "Really sis?" asks Charlotte with a small smile on her face. "For sure, you're getting there!" I smile at the sisterhood that my girls possess.
After their long encounter with the hop-scotch court they make the decision to reside to some painting. They use the sky as their inspiration and make two pretty paintings of the stars and sky. I have them both hanging in the house now, they mean so much to me.
While they're outside I spend some time with a very unhappy Kaden. Karl is happily lounging in his crib but Kade is very upset with me. "Mommy! Why you pay no attention to me? Wahh!" I guess I have been spending a lot more time with the girls so I spend the next hour or so with the boys. He's thankfully very happy with me after and is actually smiling again.
When the girls come inside they insist upon aging up. They are now living their teenage dreams of dating boys and wearing pretty dress's every single day. They have freckles now where as they didn't as children from being outside so often. I think the freckles add something to their looks that just completes them. They're cute together :)
The rest of the evening is spent watching more adult-like movies rather than their previous princess favorites. We watch Valentines Day and He's Just Not That Into You before we are all too tired to stay awake. I take special time to put the boys to bed and then it's nighty-night for Ms.Preggers!
 There's nothing better than starting a morning with labor pains! I'm up at 7:15 on the dot giving birth to THREE new joys...

 Welcome to the world girls 

<3 :)

Thanks for reading! I dealt with some SERIOUS error code 12 issues in the making of this post. A lot happened with Ambers family within a span of three hours today but I'm glad to say that the problem is resolved and I'm good to go for the challenge. Thanks again for reading and let me know in the comments below what you thought of this post, what you think of the sites new layout, and overall how you like the challenge

"Never underestimate the power of your encouragement"